HAVING FAITH

  

Having Faith

On occasion, someone will do something that makes the whole world and everyone init seem shit. Having faith in people is something I try and keep up. Not every person is a selfish twat and not everyone is a cruel nasty bastard. I know this, but now and then, someone throws you a curve ball. Got to make sure you’re ready for them. Without going into too much personal detail. I want to rant about a recent event. It’s difficult to express without betraying trusts. Even though the person hurt me deeply, I wouldn’t name them on here.

I guess the word of the day is SHAME;

•           A painful emotion caused by a strong sense of guilt, embarrassment, unworthiness, or disgrace

•           A great disappointment.

I feel ashamed.

•           Feeling shame or guilt:

•           Feeling inferior, inadequate, or embarrassed:

•           Reluctant through fear of humiliation or shame:

I feel that I didn’t deserve the treatment that I received. I was made to feel all the above. An aspect of who I am was not received well by a person. I was made to feel dead crappy because of their problem with certain aspects. Why are people like that? I know I have to move on, pull my self up, and keep on going. However, it dose not make it any easier when people knock you down. Some of the greatest words even written for a rocky movie:

“It’s not how hard you get knocked down. It’s how fast you get back up.’

So I am getting up. Dusting myself off and starting a new step on my journey of life. I am leaving that person on that old road. As much as it pains me because for this one person I had a lot of hopes and dreams. – Shame!

I am waiting for my car to be fixed today. After driving around for more than 2 weeks with my battery light constantly ON, I figured it would be a good idea to get that checked out. It would appear that I have been very lucky to have not broken down. (Result!) I have 2 wires coming out some plug, some place under my bonnet. Don’t ask me what or where, as I have no idea.

I am also waiting for my parents to arrive home from their get away. Yesterday was father’s day and I struggled all day to forget the fact. I have missed my parents more this time around than ever before. So I am itching to get down and see them!

I have tried to study today. I read a few chapters of the big arse book and I hope some of it sticks. I know my post today is not as up beat and witty as others but I am trying to drag myself back.

Cheer me up someone... please…?

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Ha!

(You know I was a stubborn child don’t you?)

Oh yea… I did some personal writing about the birth of my son, Robert. I will post some pictures and parts of my writing on here soon. I hope you take the time to read the account from what I remember. My children still amaze me every single day. As Robert grows taller everyday he reminds me, that now he is taller than me. It always makes me smile because of how small he was. You will see from the picture I shall post shortly. I know every parent feels this. I can’t explain it just makes me feel ‘blessed.’