...
15 weeks and my belly
is starting to feel weird!
I would like to say I
breezed through my 1st trimester but it would be a big fat hairy lie. I
basically I bitched, moaned, complained, puked, and dizzied my way through. I
slept a lot a puked a lot I freaked out a lot I cried a lot I screamed a lot I
had a numerous amounts of panic attacks. My mental state made me feel like I
was losing it. After my brief but disturbing moments of insanity I would feel
joy for the baby in my belly and remorse for how my behaviour was affecting my
partner and kids. Despair, self hate and anger at my own actions towards them.
It has been such a
shitty place to be, credit love and thanks to my family for helping me through.
They have all been accepting and supporting me, my partner for his constant
positive projection, support and patients and my kids for forgiveness.
Everybody including me
was waiting for 12 weeks to hurry up as all my hormoany outbursts and sickness
were likely to ease the fuck off. Much to the audible sigh of relief heard
throughout the land when I finally started to level out leaving just a tired
but happy vessel.
I was anxious about the
12 week scan. I worried to hear if our baby was doing well. I feared that baby
would look like orc ( lord of the rings –
the hobbit) after we had the scan and a lot of the anxiety drifted away
when I see the baby was in ' normal' range for everything I felt I could relax
a little. I gained a new state of mind after that day. Although tiredness is
still keeping me as her bitch and I am still suffering with narcolepsy.
Sometimes the idea of moving makes me want to lie down! This is a lot of the time as I seem to be off to the loo
every 15 minutes! And anything that involves me doing anything of energy is
like training for the Olympics and completing the krypton factor!
I am exhausted
just thinking about it!
Now my big issue is
comfort. Although the scales suggest a weight loss, my clothes and peoples
general ability to see, would suggest otherwise. My tummy feels 3 times bigger
than before. Sitting sometimes provokes
a nerve in my right arse cheek - this is like a sick joke as it is like a funny
bone. It hurts but it makes me laugh till I cry, whist trying to contain my
tears of laugher and pain I am also holding my tummy through fear of pissing
myself.
Shouting stop stop is
pointless as there is no one visible tickling me! Sleeping in bed has now become a task of getting in the
right spot for coolness and comfort. However, our 3 cats seem to be on my arse-tails
all day and night and so not only do I need to share the bed with Dave I have
to tackle 3 bed hogging whore felines.
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Ignore our bedding being washed!
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she sits in the sink in the downstairs loo and watches us..
Some might know I
suffer with carpal tunnel. I take a funky opiate based drug for my pain. My
medication has all been factored into my birth plan. I am hoping to have
steroid injections into my wrists this month so I can reduce my medication
before my due date. The
medication caused my morning sickness to be highlighted, causing me to vomit
very randomly. I end the end had a pink sick bowl all in grabbing distance. The
crazy thing was I would feel sick all fucking day and not be sick or I would
feel fine then come over feeling weird then spew up! Too much info? Sorry Also sometimes, the medication would cause small outbursts of
giggles.
This
was sometimes brought on by my own sarcastic remarks and/or TV shows or face
book posts and groups. In order to minimise the damage to the poor souls I live
with I would hide in my games on face book. Causing me to become a little
addicted and learning new curse words for the creatures in my games.
I know what you are
thinking.....
I sound fun!!
So now I am week 15 and
feeling a bit more in control of myself. I still have a cry and laugh mainly as
I watch my Chinese meal be taken away as it makes me feel sick and this upsets
me. Sickness still hanging around a little but it's more smells that
just make me feel a bit Yuk and so I move along.
I rarely finish a plate
of food I don't want to smoke still yay me and Dave, as he stopped too. I can
only stomach around 2 glasses of diet coke a day. I drink 3-4 litres of Robinson’s peach with barley juice. I am eating shit I don't
like and turning my nose up at shit I love!
Invasion of the body
snatchers!!
No wonder I've not been
feeling myself!
So now I have accepted
these little changes and mentally adjusted my thinking about a lot of things to
help me not go crazy. But my main source of reality is Dave, my family and
tracking my pregnancy as this is why this is all happening and this makes me
very happy every waking day.
So that's it for today
thanks for visiting my crazy journey. For those that do not have to ensure my face book posts here
is a little information about what is happening to us (me, baby and Dave) this
week.
Ha ha ha enjoy
Mel xx
This pregnancy info is sent to you,
compliments of Health & Parenting Ltd
Your BabyYour little one is now able to rub its eyes, yawn and even blink. If you eat or drink something that your baby doesn’t like, you may notice a tug on the umbilical cord – not really, but your baby now has the ability to grasp the cord. Your baby’s hairline is forming and hair is starting to grow on your baby’s head. Even the eyelashes and eyebrows are growing. If you’re hoping to find out the sex of your baby, unfortunately it is still too early, but it won’t take long. Even though your baby is hiccupping regularly, there is no sound produced as your baby’s windpipe is full of fluid at this stage. Your baby can also hear sounds now.
Your Body
Your body becomes prone to contracting the flu, colds, and other viruses during pregnancy. It’s not because you are not as healthy. Suppressing your immune system is your body’s way of ensuring that it does not reject the pregnancy. You will be gaining weight at a steady pace, but your weight gain should remain within the range discussed by you and your doctor. If you are carrying multiples, be sure that your diet reflects this. Your uterus continues to rise and by now you should be able to feel it slightly below your belly button. Some doctors will start to measure the distance from the pubic bone to the top of your uterus (fundal height) to track your baby’s growth. Other practitioners won’t start to measure the fundal height until week 24 of your pregnancy. Due to the rising uterus your digestive space is reduced and you may begin to notice symptom of heartburn. This can be avoided or reduced by eating smaller meals.
Health & Tips
Now is the time to start sleeping on your left side as it helps to keep the blood flow between you and your baby at a maximum level. You may find that keeping a pillow between your legs helps, especially if you are suffering from sciatic pain as it takes the pressure off the nerve. Sleep is important, even if you’re not as tired as you were during the initial weeks. If you don’t want to go to bed alone, ask your partner to watch a movie or read beside you while you fall asleep. It’s also a great time to cuddle and make plans for your baby’s future.
Partner’s info
Many partners feel a little bit left out during pregnancy. The baby is growing inside her body, and everyone is solicitous of her needs. The best way to keep from feeling alienated by the baby-hype is to get involved. While you may be tired of tossing around baby names, make it fun by seeing who can come up with the most outlandish moniker. Read about pregnancy side effects and their remedies so you can problem solve with her as she experiences some of the less amusing aspects of pregnancy. And always communicate with each other about your individual needs – the best way to keep your relationship healthy!
