GO ON LAUGH, YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO!

I can not help but wonder to myself (out loud) when will I ever learn?? I have had to become very cautious over the years, since ‘you tube’ and the ability to record from a mobile phone. My constant falling over and having true melidiot moments just scream – record me and post me on you tube now!  I might hide my clumsiness’ well to most; trust me it is not without a great deal of effort. Some might remember that on my wedding day (which one you might ask) the one that you was all present for. I did in fact fall over on the grass. All I can say is thank the lord that it was not in this day an age or the fact most people were taking advantage of the free bar * hahaha* some guests happened to see me fall backwards with my legs hanging in the air. However, some did not but I was up quick, before anyone got a chance to photo my melidiot moment. I knew that at least 3 or 4 people had a camera in their hand – the, ‘Just one more.’ photographer of course, how can any one ever forget that man! I had thought that I might have tripped up my own feet while walking down the isle. Or even slide over on the dance floor. I felt someone looking over me on this day as I could have truly hurt myself and others. 

Yesterday I parked by the school to see my son’s play. I parked in the last space near a wall. Now if you have not been out recently you might not have noticed the amount of leafs on the ground. The corner by the wall that I parked was a trap for, what I think were the whole of Basildon’s leafs. I carefully exit my car and walk around the car before I remember I had left the play tickets in the car.  Leaving my cautious self I run back to the car. Falling straight into the pile of leafs. Unknowing to me there was a curb and I stood on the edge of the curb and in I tumbled. Quickly looking around to make sure I was not seen and feeling releaf (<-) lol that I did not appear to be seen. I quickly dart in to the car, collecting tickets, and then coolly walking away like nothing had happened. (Priceless) I am a true legend aren’t I!

One other time I did show pure class was when I was out with a number of friends in a much crowed pub. Everyone was having a great time. We were not there long but our laughing and noise didn’t go UN noticed. I had to go to the loo so I ask, ‘Where is the loo?’ my friend answered, ‘It is right up the back there.’ * She points* I look and see a massive crowd of people (great – mostly men as well) so I work my way though the crowd having to touch men and slide behind them. I make it to the loo I do my business then make my way back through the ocean of men. They all happened to smell nice. They must not have liked me touching them and sliding my body behind them as they seemed to make a small gap for my return.

I saunter back to the table of friends that seem to be in a middle of a laughing fit. I smile and ask, ‘So what did I miss?’ they all seemed to be looking behind me so I look. Yes if you didn’t already know this or had guessed I had bog roll wrapped around the heel of my boot and had dragged bog roll through the entire pub. As I look back, all eyes where trailing the line of bog roll all the way to my feet, then I felt every pair of eyes settle on me. I magnificently hide my embarrassment and laugh with every one else. I slowly untangle my heel and leave it there. It was not long before someone shouted that I would get charged for taking more than my allocated amount of tissue. Ahh yes that one was a true moment I shall not forget. I have since been back to this pub to not to be remembered. But I do always check my feet before leaving all toilets now!

Live it-Learn it!